


vanilla twilight

by apocalypseplay



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Bisexual Jeremy Heere, Christine Canigula Swears, Christine Canigula as Ned, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gay Michael Mell, Good Friend Christine Canigula, Jake is kinda like Harry, Jeremy Heere as Spider-Man, M/M, Major Angst!, Michael Mell as Deadpool, Michael is also MJ, Mom Friend Christine Canigula, Pining Jeremy Heere, Pining Michael Mell, Rich is Flash, buckle in boys!, get prepared gamers, last minute decision but, loving these christine tags, michael is taller, michael says that at some point, oh boy, spiderman is a twink yall
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-25
Updated: 2019-11-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:22:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21554581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apocalypseplay/pseuds/apocalypseplay
Summary: "Oh, darling, I wish you were here."-----------------------------------------------------you do not have to know anything about Spider-Man or Deadpool to read this!! Their backstories are different, and powers will be explained throughout the story.
Relationships: Christine Canigula & Jeremy Heere, Christine Canigula/Jake Dillinger, Jeremy Heere/Brooke Lohst(Past), Jeremy Heere/Michael Mell
Comments: 3
Kudos: 14





	vanilla twilight

The grave was damaged, despite it only being put down about two years prior. Still, the words ‘Maya Heere’ were legible on the front, along with her life span and words saying how great of a woman she had been. The flowers her son had placed there last spring were still present, however they most definitely weren’t as lively as when he first bought them. The Lilies and Forget-Me-Nots had wilted long ago, their petals being long gone from the stems they were connected to. The fresh smell of dew and water, along with the mud and drops of rain on the grass around him proved that it had rained the night before. Upon further inspection, he was able to conclude that he was the only person in the cemetery at the time. Albeit, it was fairly early in the morning, and it wasn’t like people frequented the cemetery in the first place.

The boy, Jeremy, shoved his hands into his jeans’ pockets, a soft sigh escaping his lips. The silence was deafening to him. He was used to it, however, due to the myriad of times he sat perched on top of the buildings in the city. Still, that didn’t mean he enjoyed the silence, or found it to be comforting. At least, this type of silence wasn’t. It suffocated him, infiltrating his lungs and thoughts until he felt the urge to say something. And he did, though it was the only words he truly could say at a time like this.

“I’m sorry.”

A simple phrase. One he murmured many times in the depths of the night, or in the god forsaken times in the mornings after a nightmare.

The nightmares were always the same; his mother falling, just like she had years ago, and then… snap. She was gone. It was always just a repeat of what he wanted to forget most. Of what caused him the most hatred for not only the universe, but himself. After all, it was his fault. If Jeremy had just been a little quicker, or maybe even just a bit smarter, then he would still have a mother. He would still have a functioning family, and maybe a functioning life. But the universe was funny, like that. It took what you needed most when you least expected it, and forced you to continue on without it.

First, it had been his childhood- his normality, then his mother. The first of which, Jeremy had no control over. The spider from SQUIP labs biting him wasn’t something that Jeremy had caused. But his mother’s death had been all him. And he would never get over all of the shit he caused. In fact, the reason he even still did what he did was so nobody would have to go through all of this, like he did. And maybe he was being a bit selfish, as the other part of him just wanted to keep Christine alive.

He couldn’t bare to do this again. To cause another person he loved to die.

As he glanced around, hoping that there weren’t any bystanders who simply watched the overly-depressing scene of a teenage boy at his mother’s grave. Jeremy had never been the best with people, really. Christine was an exception-as was Brooke, before she moved- and maybe Michael was, too. Christine was different, however. She had known him since before the whole Spider-Man thing, and before the _”Holy shit I just killed my own mother,”_ thing, and before his home life went to shit, where he now spent most of his days at her house. She meant everything to him. And if Jeremy wasn’t so selfish, then he wouldn’t even be associated with her anymore.

No, it wasn’t because he didn’t enjoy her company anymore, or they had gotten into some petty fight where things had changed for the worst. It was because Christine knew about his superhero gig, and she wanted to help. To be the _”Girl in the chair,”_ as she had called it. Not only that, but the thespian often times patched him up after fights, and constantly lectured him about how reckless he was, where she would often state how much he worried her. Jeremy hated it when he worried her. He hated it when he was out in public with her, in all honesty. Being friends with Christine Canigula was the worst mistake of his life, second to going on the class field trip to SQUIP labs. 

Originally, Jeremy had been ecstatic when his science teacher had announced the field trip. He had always had a knack for science, it seemed, so the 7th grader had immediately rushed home with the permission slip, getting his mother to sign it and being the first to turn it in. SQUIP labs was a place Jeremy had always wanted to go, seeing that his second closest friend, Jake, was the son of someone important in those labs. He didn't talk to Jake anymore. Not after the whole _'getting powers from SQUIP labs'_ and _'Whoops! Looks like my dad's boss ended up killing your mom. Sorry about that homeslice!'_ thing. Sure, while it wasn't Jake's fault all of this happened to Jeremy of all people, he still didn't want to potentially put him in danger, and they weren't too close to begin with- cliques were beginning to form, and Jake was destined to be popular. Jeremy was not- so he just... cut him off. Christine still reprimanded him for doing that- Jeremy figured that it had to do with her crush on him- but to him, it was the best thing he could do at the time.

The boy's thoughts spiraled around each other, each taking a piece of his focus and demanding to be wandered a bit, until they got to the point where it was overwhelming. Just being here was freaking Jeremy out, his fists clenching on the flowers he had brought this time. Daffodils. While they certainly weren't her favorite- probably the exact opposite, he realized belatedly- his mother would've said something along the lines of _'It's the thought that counts, dear,'_ and place them into a vase with lukewarm water, before she would've set them on the dining room table for them all to admire over dinner. The same dining room table that used to used constantly every night, which now hadn't been used for anything besides homework since she had passed.

After placing the flowers back onto her grave, Jeremy found himself releasing a breath he didn't know he was holding, before turning on his heel and beginning to walk out of the cemetery. As his dull blue eyes flickered over the names plastered on the graves, he couldn't help but wonder how many of those people he could've saved. How many of those deaths he could've prevented. How many families he ruined, just because he wasn't quick enough, or strong enough, or- 

"Jeremy!" A voice pulled him out of his thoughts, causing his eyebrows to furrow as he scanned the area for the culprit. That's when he saw none other than Christine Canigula, bouncing towards him in her 5'4" glory. Her bright smile quickly morphed into one of worry upon approaching him, knowing her best friend long enough to know that there was some form of guilt in his mind, some form of sick blame for himself of a crime he didn't commit. 

"Jemmie," She spoke, voice a certain soft and caring that she reserved for hurt puppies or sick kittens, and... for Jeremy. The nickname made his calm demeanor immediately shift, tears forming in the taller boy's eyes as she continued to speak. "C'mere," Christine's arms extended outwards for a hug, which he immediately accepted, hurrying into her arms. Their hugs were always a good form of awkward, seeing that their height difference of seven inches caused the need for adjustment when Jeremy would bury his head into her shoulder. Which, was what he was doing now, quiet sobs and hiccups escaping his lips as he tried to listen to her words. 

"You've been doing great, you know that? Like, _Iron Man_ great. You've saved loads of people. Focus on that, okay?" She paused, sighing and pulling away slightly from their embrace, her hands on his arms as she held him there, meeting his gaze. "You can't save everyone." That was a phrase she had told him countless times, though it mostly seemed to go in one enhanced ear and out the other. Still, he nodded, tears still flooding down his freckled cheeks. "Now, how about we go back to my place, put on High School Musical, and go act out every scene?" Christine giggled, raising her eyebrows and moving her hands down his arms, taking his hands instead. 

Jeremy couldn't help but chuckle, shutting his eyes as a shaky smile appeared on his lips. "Only if it's the second one, and I get to be Gabriella."

\----------

The Canigula household was what Jeremy liked to call 'Heaven', seeing that the people there loved and cared about him. They didn't push about why he was there so often, and he was pretty sure they thought he had a thing for their daughter, but it was still a welcoming environment. Something that his own house used to be, but now was pretty much the exact opposite.

When the two arrived back there, Christine's parents were just leaving, mentioning something about heading out for an overdue date-night that had been in the works for awhile. Though he would never express this to his friend, he was envious at her parent's dynamic. The whole loving their child unconditionally thing, even when in a fight. Their love was something his own parents used to have. And now? Jeremy hasn't talked to his dad formally in months, though it felt like eternities. 

The thespian led her friend up to her room, a plan in her mind. She knew how down in the dumps Jeremy got sometimes- and for good reason, after all he's been through- and she simply wanted to make him happy again. She's been told before how great she was at cheering people up, and always tried to use that skill when anyone was upset. Especially when that 'anyone' was her best friend. Turning on the TV, Christine jumped onto her bed, patting the spot next to her with her free hand as she turned on her Disney+. It took a few minutes of scrolling and searching for her to find the movie they had decided to watch, but once it was on, and their roles were decided, it was almost as if she had never found him crying in the cemetery.

After a _dazzling_ performance of 'Fabulous', sung by Christine- with Jeremy as Ryan- the girl turned to her friend, a small smirk on her lips. "So," She started, her signature best friend look forming onto her face. "Any updates on M&M?" Her voice took on a more teasing tone as she spoke, laughing as she saw Jeremy's pale face flush red. Michael Mell- or, 'M&M', as Christine liked to call him- was a sort of a loner in their school. Sure, he sometimes hung out with the two of them, but they weren't anything more than distant friends. Though, Jeremy obviously wanted to be more than that, but he'd never be able to find the courage to tell him that. 

"Chris! I told you to stop calling him that!" He whined, trying to slip by without any updates on his 'Crush-But-He's-Way-Out-Of-My-League-And-Will-Never-Like-Me-Back(TM)'. But the raising of the shorter girl's eyebrows told him that he wouldn't slip by today, and caused him to deflate in a way, huffing softly. "No, not really. I'm pretty sure Rich is _determined_ to embarrass me in front of him, though." The bruises from the day before had already faded, but that didn't mean that the memories of him getting beaten by a guy shorter than Christine had, too. 

With a roll of her eyes, Christine flopped back onto the bed, looking up at Jeremy, who was sitting on the edge of it. "C'mon, Jemmie. Why do you even let that prick push you around? Lord knows you'd be able to knock him out in a fight." 

"Christine, look at me." She nodded lightly, signalling for Jeremy to continue, "I'm a twink. We both know this. Lanky, and like a fuckin' twig. So if I, said twink, was able to knock out _Richard Fucking Goranski,_ with one punch, people would get suspicious. Maybe not in a _'Oh shit, you're Spider-Man!'_ way, but still enough to where they'd know I was hiding something." 

After a moment of thinking on it, Christine nodded, giving a soft hum. "I suppose you're right," She murmured, before quickly sitting up as her eyes widened. "It's time." She beamed, getting off of the bed and taking Jeremy's hand, noticing his confusion. She nodded back to the screen, which was still playing High School Musical 2. 

"Time? Oh. Oh!" He laughed softly, quieting down as _'You Are the Music in Me'_ started playing, to which they both began singing along as their respective parts.

The two spent the entire night watching Disney movies, laughing and singing and enjoying their time together, as if the evils in the world simply ceased to exist. And if Christine had the choice to do that, she wouldn't hesitate. Just watching her best friend smile and dance and be _happy_ made her want to freeze time and keep the moment living on forever. Though... she knew that couldn't happen. Jeremy had a job to do, and it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that the universe would do that to someone, especially someone so caring and kind to everyone he met. 

But right now, that wasn't what mattered. What mattered was that Jeremy Heere was _alive._

And Christine would do everything in her power to keep it that way.

**Author's Note:**

> special thanks to my rp partners, and Heere_I_Go_Again for inspiration to finally finish and publish this!!! (seriously, if you haven't checked out their story, go read it!!! it's amazing!!) any comments would be greatly appreciated, whether it's just what you liked or disliked, or constructive criticism! i haven't written on here in awhile, so any help would be lovely (:


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